Round here it smells like dog’s piss.
Stumbling in the dark across a light switch,
Between reality and nightmares there is a drift.
The feeling is eerie
Blood, sweat droplets and for some reason I’m all teary
If I tell him
He may think I’m a liar liar, but am I Jim Carey?
My best friend introduced me to his left-handed girlfriend,
Lesson number one: never trust a lefty even if she’s sexy.
It started off all right; she talked so sweet like apple crumble dessert
I’m being modest,
She was super hot like the Sahara desert.
This cactus pricked me when I caught her red handed making off with someone else’s spaghetti balls in her.
This topic is touchy so I don’t want to get too inner.
The thin line between discomfort and awkwardness is getting anorexic thinner,
I knew I would have to foot the bill,
So that left me stuck with my foot in my mouth
Because the news I would have to break to him would be like urm shoot the messenger!
Confronted her in private and she told me “Delz, I wish I never gave Derek the booty!”
The devil in a blue dress went to the toilet and I saw the text message from her
“We still on tonight for the movies? After we can go back to yours, roomie!”
This girl is a dumb Lucy
Loosely living life, her life is P square singing, “do me”
She can’t move smoothly
Don’t want to poke nose but I have to be snoopy
In support of my best friend, call me a groupie.
So I met with him
And this is what I said to him.
“I can’t lie
Your girl she’s beautiful…
But she’s a beautiful mistake!”
He punched me in the face.
He didn’t believe me, he chose her, over me and that’s why we don’t talk till this very day.
Dele ‘Delewrites’ Osunsami 04.08.2012